you can act a certain way

and i'll respond in a fairly predictable way

the only thing i find unpredictable is quantum theory and particle acceleration experiments

being smarter than me means you see things from a higher perspective

i avoid eye contact with everyone in public areas 80% of the time i am in public areas

i have settled for nothing inside of a screen that displays information to my face

this is what 'writers block' feels like

i don't believe in 'writers block' because all you need to do to write is write down your thoughts and i never don't have thoughts

maybe 'seller's block' is more apt

but lately i feel like writing something is stupid

because every day i could write the same thing

and this is what that thing could be

i click on gmail

i click on word documents

i click on firefox

i click on myspace

i click on my blog

i click on statcounter

i click on other blogs

i click on facebook

i click on live journal

i click on thesaurus.com

i stare at the computer screen

i click on all of those things again

i write copy

i read a novel

i feel bored and stop reading the novel

i boil water and watch the water

i make tea

i stare at the computer screen

i click on more of the same things

i click on them again

i click on microsoft word

i write one line of a poem and save it as the line i just wrote

i look at my cell phone

i click the one line of a poem word document

i write another line

i think 'i suck at writing, i don't have real talent'

i close the word document

i feel anxiety about money

i feel a generalized anxiety about everything

i try to understand my thoughts

i give up immediately

i click on gmail

i click on msn instant messenger

i look at my coworkers and feel alienated

i go to the library

i click on things

i stare at the computer screen

i feel annoyed

this happens for two hours

i walk home

i stare at the computer screen

i turn on my space heater

i tell the cat to go away

i feel anxiety about not giving the cat what it wants from me

i think 'i don't know what to do with myself; right now, and in my whole life'

i think 'there won't ever be anything different than this'

i eat fruits and vegetables

i eat hummus with olive bread

i get drunk

i play video games

i avoid the computer screen

i feel extreme anxiety about the internet

i talk to my roommate

i walk to the store

i look at people

i spend money on alcohol

i use my credit card

i go home

i stare at my computer screen

i click on gmail

i click on myspace

i click on facebook

i click on livejournal

i click on statcounter

i look at my bed

i look at my space heater

my watch beeps

i look at my cell phone

i feel anxiety about being disinterested in other people's blogs

i block everyone on gmail chat except for people i never chat with

i change my status to 'appear offline' on msn messenger

i smoke a cigarette

i wonder if i will ever make any friends in seattle

i feel anxiety about my parents

i feel like im not doing enough to appease my family

i click on youtube

i open up microsoft word

i write two sentences of a story

i close microsoft word

i piss

i look at myself in the mirror

i avoid making eye contact with myself in the mirror

i look at the cat

i stare at the computer screen

i think about joining real life more

i look at my novels

i feel like there is no way i will ever read them

i feel anxiety about doing nothing

i try to think of what i would rather be doing

i think about sex

i think that there is no one i know that i would want to have sex with

i think about drinking with friends

i think i would like to do that if i had friends

i cant think of anything i would rather be doing in my current situation

i think about how to get out of my current situation

i look at the computer screen

i click on things

and then this would be the second part of the poem

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

there is nothing in my reality that i feel i want enough to try

i will refrain from writing these poems every day

i don't want to write those every day